i've counted 4 condom wrappers but only 3 condoms. not again.
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
So you know that marine I slept with, well his girlfriend just told me I was pretty, I almost feel bad for sleeping with him now...
Dont! You were just serving you country
someday when you wake up in a dumpster we'll have to have this conversation again...
How do you get a 7 on a pregnancy test?
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
So I found "Fat chicks in saran wrap" in my search history.
That's all you talk about when you are wasted.
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
Oh god now he thinks I'm into him because I've been staring at him trying to figure out what animal he looked like
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
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