It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
is it sad that i think every plant i pass on the highway looks like a plant from farmville?
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
Chick stood right next to me in the elevator. Like she had the whole elevator and she stood right next to me. So I farted.
we put a pacifier in your mouth because you kept drunkenly singing country music.
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
I've heard awesome things about their margaritas. I also may buy a mustache from party city. Would you do me with a mustache on??! Hahahaha. But, really.
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
I think I gave a random lady a dildo
Again?!
All I remember is me taking my automatic nerf gun getting on top of him and saying..."look whos in control now!"
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
Randomize
