Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
HE COULDN'T FIND IT! WHAT KIND OF QUARTERBACK CAN'T FIND IT?!
I tried really hard to get you laid last night. And by that I mean I asked a bunch of dudes if they were top or bottom.
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
He ran around the party with a broken foot/ankle with a gallon of Malibu yelling "it must rain coconut"
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
Hes done the math! Hes calculated how much sex it's going to take to fuck 365 miles. Now thats a little brother im proud of. New resolutions are a go!
I'm in Home Depot and I can feel the straight bob the builders staring at me. I bet it's like I have a rainbow arrow pointing at me.
He had the same tone in his voice and look in his eyes that he gets when he says UFOs aren't real.
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
Right before he dumped me... he got a really ugly pair of pants. They were twill pants. A pinkish color. When I'm sad... I picture him in them. It makes me smile.
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
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