I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
Apparently I kept telling the bartender that I was going to set the Guinness World Record.
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
My parents just told me that if I stop drinking I could do something great with my life...
They obliviously haven't seen you dance on top of a pool table then
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
I'm terrified that I'm going to have a baby with a guy who posts snapchat stories while ignoring my texts
When did i become the Rickety Cricket of my own life?
I gave three different guys a boner at the same time last night, and none of them are in the same city as I am. That's achievement.
I'm gonna fight the coyote
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
Fruitcakes are only good for throwing at neo Nazis.
Randomize
