Booty call?
Dude you don't even follow my twitter
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
when i grow up i'm putting garbage disposals in all showers of my house so when you vomit in the shower its easy clean up
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
I literally told her "she's a sandwich I'd like to make" and that's all it took
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
If I win the lottery I'm going to hire someone to skywrite "FUCKTARD" over his house. That much anger.
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
I had to switch coats with someone at work because you can see the giant sex choke bruise on my neck. Being kinky is hard.
I shotgunned a beer immediately puked and rallied. And by rallied I mean had sex in the bathroom after he held my hair.
What a gentleman.
... and this time i WILL NOT make out with anyone dressed as batman.
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
Randomize
