Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
He taught me how to drive a stick by using his dick. He even made the whurrrr noise so I knew when to change gears.
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
Having a race with the dryer. Seeing who can get drunk/dry clothes faster.
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
I really just want to eat 20 mcnuggets and slap everyone with the box when I'm done.
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
Do you know who changed all my phone contacts into characters from Harry Potter?
He Who Must Not Be Named.
Fuck you.
Idk if I want to put a bra on
Randomize