so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
Santa Claus winked at me two tables over at the Chinese place tonight I was almost afraid he knew "getting laid" was my Christmas wish
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
he just sent me a picture of his penis sticking through a piece of paper that he had drawn a stick figure with tits on it that said "you"
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
Dude I asked him to get me beef jerky at 4 am and he actually walked to CVS to get it. CVS closes at 12 but it was the perfect opp to dip out
I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
On a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being “good” and 10 being “banging a student’s father”, how bad is it that I’m banging a student’s father?
Randomize
