i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
how should i feel about a person who brings a box of eggo waffles on the plane as a carry on?
Well we're gonna drink when we get home and I just invited the cab driver to play beer pong
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
youre just mad because i have donuts and im beautiful
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
I just got dropped off by that cop that pulled you over. Best sex ever! Consider that $140 ticket my birthday present.
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
Randomize
