ok i'm going to motor boat your sister now. ttyl
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
I am omw to AA Fellowship by the sea w Jenny and a stripper who just paid for our jetski with 85 $1 bills
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
Apparently I made a stripper cry last night when I paid her $10 to go away
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
I think I'm done drinking. How did we end up partying at a frat house with my mom...
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
Randomize
