i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
dude, I just walked in on your little brother changing clothes...I'm ashamed to say I noticed, but that kid has as MASSIVE cock...
Yeah...we all know. it's the elephant in the room at family gatherings.
that is a frighteningly accurate metaphor for it.
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
Next time he asks to wax your nipple while you're passed out I promise I'll be sober enough to intervene.
I put my hydrocodone prescription in my cereal box its like real lucky charms
If you're not going to call the girls I bring around by name, at least don't call them by number. It's been cockblocking since girl #47. Dick.
You showed them your nipple for dollars for the jukebox. You were depressed because only one of your songs played. Oh then you twisted your ankle and blamed it on your mad stripper skills.
No shame in my game.
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
i regret nothing
brb throwing up in the dishwasher
i regret everything
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
Remember the random guy who licked my face when we were at the bar the other night?
Yeah. His name is Andrew. We just met
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