well I can't set my house on fire every night
Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
you made me "pop lock and drop it" as a sobriety test last night..
you told his mom that the only thing he wants for christmas is his dick in your mouth
May God have mercy on my new vibrator.
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
I just found a bag of teeth...
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
I got to the party and found your shoes in a bag of Funyuns. You weren't even there.
I'm imagining a seal in an ugly shirt hahahahaha Percocet
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
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