Do you think "I had sex with my co-worker last night I don't think I can come in today" is a good excuse?
trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
She asked to borrow my chapstick then said "I promise I won't get herpes on it"
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
Just rolled over and found your boyfriend in bed with me. Is mine at your house?
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
My boss walked in on me puking in the urinal while taking a piss. Sunday funday is eroding my last shred of credibility at work.
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
Nothing is better than seeing someone you fucked go to the Olympics. I feel so American.
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
Randomize
