I'm pounding a vodka drink as we speak to make her interesting
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
You remember those guys we called the police on after they stole our keg? Turns out one of them is a student instructor in one of my classes. Figuring out how best to use this information.
I really thought you were going to tell me you were pregnant on facebook chat. FACEBOOK CHAT. I almost cried.
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
At the ER. John needs stiches. Fuck pub trivia nights.
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
Can you repeat that, but with context?
Last night at a party someone grabbed my ass so I just fucking punched them in the face then went home and ate a frozen pizza
Wait you actually sent a text to your self saying “love you I miss you"?
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
Randomize