I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
IT'S FRIDAY. So quit being a pussy, get out of bed, and come help me drink these 40s. That's not a request.
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
You gave me your shirt to use as a napkin every time I spilled beer on myself. Before we went to the bar.
The site I use to study flash cards keeps showing ads for truck companies hiring drivers. It's like the site is saying "hey, we all know there's no hope for you, just give up and Become a truck driver."
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
B. I found a note on my phone and all it says is 'Fuck yeah im a racecar'
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