well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
If you did the rosary as much as you masturbated, you would be the pope
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
Dude, I had to stop mid fuck. Her cat was swatting at my balls as I did her from behind. I couldve lost something.
Idk what the interview would be like but I imagine you in a suit and tie surveying a nervous freshman and eventually leading him into a labyrinth of debauchery and clapping him on the back, saying "welcome to the fraternity, son"
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
Just found the measuring tape in my bathroom. How drunk could I have possibly been on Saturday?!
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
Am I required to send a Christmas card to my fuck buddy?
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
Randomize
