plz talk dirty to me
theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
She set an alarm on my phone for her birthday. Place: Her bed.
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
We just fucked each other sober. #goteam
Nothing says "Jesus has forgiven your sins" like finding out you're not pregnant on Easter.
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
I don't like kids.
You were literally holding a baby 5 minutes ago
I like them before they learn to speak and after they learn to think.
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