Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
oddly enough my penis is pretty tan. the part of my body that gets the least amount of sunlight is tanner than most of the rest of my body.
I think its part of male evolution. Pretty soon they'll have diamonds on them and taste like chocolate.
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
i may have given a gay guy with a mohawk my number last night that said... "you are straight" omg so glad a whole year til my next birthday... also i hit myself in the face with a car door. nice.
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
I bet you there is porn for people who get off on someone rubbing Chipotle on themselves
we went outside for a smoke and when we came back in you were ptfo on the floor holding the phone to your ear. Pizza pizza was on the line.
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