I'm being pulled over???
For what!?!?!
??? I'm in a cab!!!!!
Apparently he's never heard a queef, he totally thought I farted and got freaked out.
I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
Just saw a woman with a Pomeranian in her bra. Way to step up your game Seattle.
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
I AM OFFERING YOU ALCOHOL AND THE CHANCE TO LET ME SAY FUCK IT TO MY RESPONSIBILITIES. HOW MANY TIMES DOES THIS HAPPEN?!
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
Randomize
