lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
The investigator asked if we were sharing a pitcher of margaritas. I corrected him and explained that we each had our own.
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
my last search of the night was "the physics of green eggs and ham" what the fuck
I'm literally 40 minutes from where I was supposed to stay. I woke up in a parking lot.
Two guys I banged regularly got married this week. I need vodka.
I could tell my life story through kermit memes
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize
