meet me or not, i'm out of control
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
you know it takes a lot for me to use utensils conservatively
on the subway to an interview & there's a dude doing whippits out of a cheese wil can
Selling drugs in raindeer antlers is the best way to spread christmas cheer
I am just pathetic enough to be sitting on the couch with my cat drinking absinthe and vodka watching moulin rouge. Hello, tuesday night.
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
I threw a dessert topping at a baby tonight so drink up! If you stay sober tonight I will be very disappointed in you.
Smoked a blunt with my dad then introduced him to cinnabon delights. Today was a good day.
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
Tell me why i have 60 matches in 72 hours on tinder. Can i sell my tinder account like people used to sell their myspace pages and tumblrs when they had a lot of followers? Is that a thing?
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
Randomize
