can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
The fact that he is from Canada is way more embarrassing than the fact that you met him on match.com
Nothing says walk of shame better than a onesie and a 12 pack of corona..
I just tipped the cab driver with pistachio nuts. And he loved it.
Someone woke me up and gave me a sprite and some pills. I put them in my belly button. Trust no one.
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
He's asking if he can send a dick pic. How do I politely decline that?
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.
ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
I don’t want to brag, but vows, morals and will power are no match for my blow job skills
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