dude, i look like john mccains neck right now
I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.
I would have been "that girl" at the party last night if it wasn't for that girl who puked in the potted plant...
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
He still lectured me about forgetting shit. Than he said he's gonna paint me green so I can stand in a corner and be a plant.
I just held a marble with my kegel muscles for 5 min. You may call me COCKCLAMP 9000!!!!
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
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