Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
Pls don't use the words alligator, purple, and sperm in the same sentence ever again.
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
she was pretty happy for someone in the middle of a herpes outbreak, how was i supposed to know?
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
Im only pretending to be his friend so I can sleep with his girlfriend.
If you ever bitch out on 72oz margarita night again, this friendship is over
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
I'm pretty sure my lung is caught on my rib. And I can't feel the left side of my face. Best. Sex. Ever.
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
I'm so festive that I used my jack o lantern bucket as a just in case barf bin
Randomize