Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
I got turned off after he said, "i can see us in the future...me, you, and a back yard full of alpacas."
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
I need to immerse myself in a tub of peroxide to kill whatever traces of him are on me.
I started crying during a meeting at work and now I'm sitting on my couch drinking boxed wine at 1:30 in the afternoon. Fuck you too estrogen.
I have successfully trained your dog to bring me pudding cups!
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
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