i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
Our house smells like week old pizza, beer cans, cigarettes, and depressing career tracks....get lysol.
yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
i just recognized the girl sitting across from me from a lesbian porno... should i ask for an autograph?
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
Yeah well my vagina has expectations too but they don't get met all the time.
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
styled my pubes into a mustache as a surprise. Thought you should know
It's like that thing with the devil and the angel except one shoulder has orgasms and the other has stuffed crust pizza and depression.
don't worry about my dad. he just hates you because you're liberal, not because we're fucking.
This girl I interned with got engaged today and I'm just like over here taking plan B with my tacos and PBR.
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
What you have to understand is that our lives aren't a disappointment so much as they crashed and burned with lethal doses of radiation and dog shit.
Randomize
