I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
Oh btw, my mom called... you made the police blotter in the newspaper. Don't worry, she's mailng me a copy so I can put in on the fridge.
Showing up at the grocery store at 5am to have the clerk sprint to the condom cabinet waiving the keys because you told him to hurry it was an emergency
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?
All I'm saying is that your next houseguest had better not barge in on me in the shower demanding I wash the stolen dye from his hair. I'm not doing that a second time.
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
For the record, it's NEVER ok to discuss my stripper-related injuries with my fiance.
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
Seriously I am not buying you condoms anymore. You're 22, if you aren't woman enough to buy them yourself then you don't deserve orgasms. Grow some tits.
That moment when you're in a room with 3 guys and know how big their dicks are. Then you are married to the one with the smallest dick.
You can’t judge a dick by its balls.
Randomize
