Facials are how you say "I love you" in porn star.
im watching shaqs comedy special. this is how i know im not sober.
Totally just asked Dad if I needed to show the real estate guy my tits so he would let us buy the house. I've really got to work on that filtering thing.
Some random slut told me I was a good dancer then gave me a handjob. I felt like fucking John Travolta.
He taught me how to drive a stick by using his dick. He even made the whurrrr noise so I knew when to change gears.
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
How would I get in touch with Carly Rae Jepsen if I wanted to thank her for the loss of my virginity?
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
you know its getting late when the "nevers" are turning into "maybe"
It was sweet, he carried me out of my bathroom after I passed out, built me a pillow fort so I wouldn't roll out of bed, set a glass of water on the table, and brought me a mixing bowl to puke in. Totally a sign we're more than just fuckbuddies.
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
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