weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
We walked past a group of guys in front of a bar last night and they claimed, I quote: Wow, we'd actually have to work for that.
It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
And then you gave the bride a high five and said "Go forth and Consummate."
What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
I told you I'm not going to the Phillies game until we're tripping balls
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
Last night I had a dream that a man with an ice cream body entered a bicycle throwing contest and won.
Randomize
