I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
I think I just broke my ankle. I've only had one beer. I'm getting drunk before I go to the ER so it's less embarassing.
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
If you say no to drinking on a Monday then I'm going to take you to the hospital for a MRI
I was thinking more like a "sorry you can hear us, but I'm having the best sex of my life" cake
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
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