His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
I knew it was time to leave Waffle House when you started singing "What's Your Fantasy" to your hash browns.
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
I'm gonna give the beer pong table a viking pyre funeral at the bon fire.
Prepare for massive TMI but anyway long story short I have a Swiss flag band-aid across my balls.
What a patriot you are. How'd it happen?
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
I have fence marks all over my body
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
Give me one good reason why I should go with you.
Free beer.
..pick me up at 8.
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