I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
I hope the doctor doesnt lift up and my shirt and listen to my lungs. I dont want to explain why I have rug burns on my back.
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
I will always remember today as the day I narrowly escaped having to touch a tiny penis
I was barred out and drunk as fuck locked out at 3am in my Indian costume. It was literally freezing outside. I laid down on the concrete and made a bonfire with dry leaves. Then proceeded to ask.the.bonfire nicely to "please dont go out". Drunk me went strait up survival mode.
He peed in the bird bath. Those birds are gonna be pissed
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
There I was, puking into the toilet, and he was rubbing my feet, buck naked. I feel like a drunk Disney princess.
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
Double-fisting ice cream and wine. Do not send help.
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
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