your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
you kept spraying the cat with water and then telling it to "man up" when it cried
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
just cockblocked my boss's 17 year old son at the Christmas party
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
my last search of the night was "the physics of green eggs and ham" what the fuck
My mom and sister were over. When my drunk roommate came home, he yelled "GOT BITCHES IN MY CONDO"
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
If I ever drink whiskey again make sure I don't eat the plastic cups that I'm drinking them from.
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
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