Whenever I miss you I just turn on Tool Academy
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
Doors open. I'm laying in bed watching caddy shack and drinking a vodka tonic.
And I'm out of vodka so bring vodka or 2013 will blow ass
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
Nothing like a little " am I gonna shit myself " to spice up the work day
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
Ain't no cockblock like hearing the word"HOOODOOORR!" shouted from the bedroom floor while in the middle of sex.
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
I smell like a mix of alcohol, sweat, and sex and its only 10 AM
Randomize
