ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
he asked me to help him wrap his girlfriends birthday presents. Dont worry we fucked right after.
His body is like Jesus fingering me while I eat birthday cake
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
If you want to borrow my flask for all future interviews as a good luck charm because your last one went so well with it in your suit pocket, just let me know
You started an entire relationship based only on sex and emoticons.
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
Randomize
