garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
so i just realized i am an alcoholic. I was making some tomato soup because im still sick, and put vodka in it. sad huh? lets go out!
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
I woke up at 4 am to my roomate peeing all over my clean laundry. He thought he was in the bathroom and yelled at me for being in the bathroom with him while he was peeing.
Literally best acid trip ever. Better than sex. At one point she looked over at me, started crying, holds up her hands and said "dinosaur tears of sadness". Craziest roommate ever.
I figured working in my office on the 34th floor I'd be safe railing xanax off my desk. Of course, I snort it just in time for the window washer guy to give me a thumbs up.
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
At least I know that however bad my life gets and how low I can feel I'll never feel shitting in a red robin parking lot low
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
Don't tell me you're on acid again
You are cut off. Your giant penis and crazy awesome sex is ruining my body...
I've just realized that today's rations have consisted of turkey bacon and jack Daniels.
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
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