super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
I feel like I should put "don't judge me" in the special instructions for the pizza guy.
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
I woke up on your bathroom floor, i used your towel I found laying on the floor as a cape to get to your bed. I thought it would help me walk straight if I looked like a superhero
I just jerked off in front of my dog to make him jealous of my thumbs. There are consequences for stealing the last cheeto!
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
No one wanted to hang out so vodka and I are hanging out
Do you think this 2 hour Amazon delivery thing works on vibrators? Cause that would be clutch
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
Randomize
