We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
Just for future reference: milk is NOT a good mixer no matter how drunk you are.
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
you're right. i am beautiful. like a May day. frolicking in a meadow of wildflowers. platinum in one hand. pipe in the other. that kind of beautiful.
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
My mom just drunk texted me complaining about her genitals smelling like Taco Bell. I really am her son
Eating an avocado like an apple while doing shots of fireball and watching finding nemo. I need to get my shit together.
Remember when I convinced you to watch me eat my sandwich just so you could reuse my plate and save us money on our water bill? I'm so ecofriendly when I'm high
Randomize
