Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
he kept kneeing me like he was playing footsies... only then i realized it was his dick.
This frat boy drinking a forty and wearing a pussy patrol shirt just ran out in front of my car. I should have used less brakes.
i make up for being a shitty girlfriend by being amazing in bed.
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
You yelled "hold my dick" before you tackled the guy away from the dj and two random girls moved to actually hold it, then argued about it. I want that whore aura!
don't care how drunk i am. my dick was like "nope, not doing it, you can't make me and i was like oh yes i can"
Every minute you wait for the sex that's not gonna happen, we're missing a tone deaf, drunk, tard-asaurus rex half-sing a 90's song to a bunch of other dinotards at karaoke.
I really should have gone with the man who kept offering me cocaine. Why did I chose the German!? STUPID!
I never thought I'd have to apologize for tasting like absinthe and cheetos before tonight
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
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