question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
I need to stop having one night stands with guys in my building so I can have someone to borrow milk from without it being awkward
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
Suuuuuuper drunk and just sang fuck her gently to the chiminea. I'm in bad shape.
I kind of drew a blank when the doctor asked me how I got super glue up my nose.
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
The Russian stripper asked if I like foreign girls. I told her I absolutely fucking hate accents. Most awkward 7 minutes ever
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
One of my life goals was never to see an uncircumcised dick. I guess that's out the window now.
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
next time you go get food at three am and leave a rando here can you warn me??? Also i tazed him. but it was just my little one so i think he'll be fine. bring me some fries.
Randomize
