Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
the room spins SO much faster in panama
Just walked out of my apartment and came face to face with a shirtless dude playing with his balls and trying to tie his shoes.
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
I don't deserve a penis
I just face planted on a condom wrapper in my bed...thought of you.
You're so romantic.
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
I've got enough liquor to do one of two things on Friday: 1.) Drink myself into a coma or 2.) lay in bed a drunk and cry lonely mess. Happy Valentines Day.
I'm actually more excited that I had so much sex this weekend that my ovaries hurt
I didn't know how to commemorate his death, so I snorted a fat line off of his obituary. Rest in peace.
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
Randomize
