is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
We are so drunk I just let him piss between my legs on the toilet. That's love.
Referring to yourself in third person during sex is apparently an instant turn off
The good news is the house is clean, the bad news is someone redecorated the bonus room by spray painting "free willy" on the wall in honor of the girl who passed out in there last night.
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
Y'know i appreciate how accepting you are of me being a terrible person.
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
So i woke up this morning to find my boss passed out on my living room floor.. Awkward? Haha
I woke up with sticky red stuff all over my sheets, face, and chest. Apparently after I blacked out I thought eating ribs in bed was a good idea
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
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