Oww! U thought rug burn was bad! Fuckin carseat burn hurts like a mother!!!
Wtf?
Use the slutty part of ur brain.
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
i can't wait to kiss dudes with my vampire teeth in.
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
so... the fat chick just walked over, shook my hand, then introduced herself as "versatile". shoot me now.
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
when my phone is in portrait view you can just assume i've been watching porn. that's the only thing i want to see in full view.
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
You are an awesome peach made of glitter.
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
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