well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
He's doing the 1:45AM lap: he goes around the bar, finds the hottest crying girl 15 minutes before close, and brings her home. I would feel bad for the girls if it wasn't such incredible genius.
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
in respone to your voicemail you left me on saturday, yes i had gone to bed and no i was not still drinking at 5am
Dude this breakup has officially hit rock bottom. sitting around watching women's NCAA basketball instead of going out
And don't worry, my exact words were "I can't believe a baby came outta that thing"
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
BoomCity!!!
You don't have to text me that every time you have sex. I already heard you ring the gong.
If I am telling you about the details of the shits I take I probably don't want to have sex with you. Probably.
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
dude the dog literally grabbed the condom out of the trash can and threw it in the air i'm screaming
Randomize
