Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
We left the window open. My vibrators funeral is at 2ish.....bring a side dish or some shit.
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
That was before I lit my hair on fire
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