yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
She touched you, you're now contaminated for 48 hours. Please watch out for rashes, hives and STDs as she's known to have all three.
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
You did this to me with your delicious pizza and moonshine.
I'll forgive you once we're drunk again by noon.
Hey so I just want to get straight to the point it was me who ate the last cupcake and it was your sister who I fucked last nigt
Asking the homeless man what buss shelter is the warmest was not a good idea
I hit a child with a fudge sickle from a moving vehicle after he flipped me off, I feel like a God. Tell no one. My partner didn't see it.
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
Halfway through the night I was hiding in a trashcan. Then I "sobered" up and ran around the house throwing change because I wanted to make my last moments of 2013 charitable.
BRING THE BAGELS
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
Randomize
