whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
Some girl just toasted to friendship and love. I want to break her neck.
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
And I'm only telling you that because I really wanted to use 'my boyfriend' and 'dick biscuit' in the same sentence.
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
so in case you needed a ticket for the Hot Mess Express, I'm the conductor now.
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
That's when I realized I was probably naked in the wrong bed
Randomize
