I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
i just found my sim card.....i hid it in my tylenol bottle....i guess to ensure i would find it mid-hangover
Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
You chanted SOFA PIZZA all night then we woke up to find about ten slices under the cushions where you were sleeping....
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
Guys, Black Friday does not exist in the world of dealing. Stop texting me asking what my deals are.
I just hooked up with the same bartender my dad cheated on my mom with in the 90s. Not sure how this makes me feel.
family traditions my good sir
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
Randomize
