I'd wear matching sweaters with you
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
If you're trying to piece together your night, I can tell you where those tassels came from.
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
the police told me I had to sign a waiver stating that my car will no longer be used for crime activity.
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
Just walked by a girl saying to her friend "honestly you coulda given me any dude and I woulda fucked him"
You should've introduced yourself
We probably are going to die. So. Thanks for agreeing to be my Maid of Honor even though I torture you.
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
Randomize
