WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
I was more obsessed with the sweat stain on her back that was simultaneously shaped like a vagina and the virgin Mary.
he just kept texting even after we lit his shoelaces on fire. he just calmly walked into the pool... still texting.
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
Bring me pizza. I'll trade you your underwear you left here for 2 slices.
Pretty sure I just got the ok to have a one night stand in Maui...from mom. I'd say that's a win in my book.
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
Seriously though, I walked in and he was holding my cat in the air singing "the circle of life"...
Randomize
