East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
He fell asleep in the strip club and they paid some stripper $20 to sit on his face until he woke up.
He's cheating on his wife, and he's judging me for eating McDonalds
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
High school girls are buying me shots. This will not end well.
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
"Wine night with the girls" turned into me having to set an alarm in the bathtub this morning...
Also, can next Friday be Long Underwear Friday instead of Jockstrap Friday? Because I'm about to cough up a testicle.
Who looks around on a bright, sunny day and says, "you know what? Today I'm going to write gay dinosaur erotica"
His baby mama found the pictures of us, she couldn't see my face but she could see my asshole. So I'm safe.
I feel like you're the sexual bearcat I've always wanted to be.
Yep, you're going to hell.
I take on this great possibility with a beer in one hand and the girl I'm gonna fuck later in the other
Randomize