If Billy Mays did an infomercial on your dick, it still wouldn't get you laid.
my underwear are soaked with white zifandel yet i have continued to wear them despite the fact im at home
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
How do you get a 7 on a pregnancy test?
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
I need to find my pants, a way out of here, and a cheeseburger.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
And by "schedule" I meant crumbled up liquor store receipt, that I wrote shit on.
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
Oh, cold wet seat on the 48! Are you piss? Are you the sweaty ass leavings of an obese person? Are you the spilled King Cobra from the night before? I do not know! I dare not smell to find out... Pants ruined...
I know you are gonna wanna ask a lot of questions but when we are home I need to cover your face with deli meat and photograph it
I don't know what song to play at my bong's funeral!
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
Randomize